I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
