Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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