But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
