dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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