He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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