At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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