Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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