i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
