So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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