stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Randomize
