Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
He felt like a one man threesome
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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