I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Randomize
