oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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