Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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