My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
