no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
