is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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