The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Randomize
