He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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