Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize