Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
