I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
My vagina is very pro this idea
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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