And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
