too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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