Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
