what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
