i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
