Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
