i just wanna soil my oats bro
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
