I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Randomize