I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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