I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
