My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
