the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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