seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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