For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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