Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Don't make out with my wife yet
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
