arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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