How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
