Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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