We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize
