just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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