R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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