Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
