if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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