Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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