So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
