kristin has been a bad kristin
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
