Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
