Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
